He Walks the Lot

My story begins early in the morning when my car salesman hubby pulls his tired, old body from the bed at the latest possible minute. Dragging his back bumper to the bathroom is not an easy task since he put on a few pounds during the long winter hiatus of sales. In spite of moving hundreds of cars around the lot in blizzard conditions and cleaning them off with every snow fall his mid section has more capacity than he needs. Now begins the work to make a classic look good enough to compete with younger counterparts.

After a wash he hesitates to wipe the steam from the mirror knowing the old model is far from the best on the lot. Applying a trim package, some body work and new top coat, he gasses up on caffeine and heads toward the door repeating to himself, "I feel good, I feel great, I feel wonderful". His number one cellular device is revved up and strapped to his hip as he lunges out followed by my send off, "Go get 'em tiger!"

First mark on the agenda is the customary daily sales meeting. His positive attitude is now in the toilet after being told he couldn't sell a camel to a legless nomad. But, there are always those worthless sales incentives to raise his moral and make him want to sell his mother-in-law. After all who wouldn't want a $10 Starbucks gift card or a one night stay in Aruba...plane ticket and meals NOT included.

Barely escaping the meeting with bits of his self image still in tact, he heads for the lot. A breath of fresh air and a two mile walk is just what he needs to polish those abrasions and renew his scrapped attitude.

A few phone calls later and more walks around the lot he returns to the showroom. He heads for the coffee pot and pours himself a cup of the steamy brew. Just as he's ready to take a sip he spies a customer. It's his cousin. After spending hours locating exactly what cousin wants, cousin says he can get a better deal down the street. The coffee is now old and cold, and my old classic is short on lunch and sales.

Sitting down at his desk he takes a few minutes to lasso his sanity and writes a note to self to remove cousin from family tree. All at once a text appears on his cell, his desk phone rings, and he's paged at the same time. Excitedly, he reaches for the desk phone first and his chair rolls out from under him. His keister is now planted firmly on the floor and the entire sales staff is hovered around thinking grandpa had a heart attack.

For the remainder of his twelve hour stint he bears the brunt of being the joke of the day.

Finally, he catches an up looking to test drive a brand spanking new SUV. He patiently explains all the extras, and listens to the customer rave about all the things he likes in the vehicle. Getting a little excited about the mini he will make on this sale that will buy groceries for a week, he returns from the test drive and offers to buy customer a soda or water. Customer accepts the water, thanks him for the test drive and says I don't want to buy I just wanted to see how it handled.

Now, after hours of down time and fruitless phone calls, at the lowest point of his day the manager approaches and tells him to get a hair cut, glasses, a crown on that front tooth, and fix the bum knee. He tells manager to lower the quota so he can get the commission he deserves. Manager tells him if they did that they would have to pay him higher commission....:/

Catching another up he discovers customer is interested in a used vehicle. He can't help but be a little hopeful since this would be the only sale in his day. They find good camaraderie and a vehicle customer likes. They test drive, agree on a trade in, decide on a number, write up a contract and customer enters finance. Mean while my lot walker is doing the math in his head figuring how many more of these he needs to make monthly mortgage payment. An hour later customer emerges from finance looking disappointed and defeated.

A delivery for a sales consultant friend takes up the rest of his evening and for three hours work his commission is a free lunch.

Eight forty five arrives and he relishes the fact that in fifteen minutes he can go home. Surprise! A customer that's come in twice before at the same time of day says he's decided on a vehicle. My old rolls royce is on a roll figuring he can end the day on the upside. After more test driving, dealing, and numbers customer says I'll be back next week.

Leaving the dealership my lot walker reminds himself he has a delivery the next day...his day off.

Why I Blog

I blog because I'm in a tizzy.

I blog to keep my fingers busy.

I blog in mourning or in joy.

I blog about my girls and boy.

I blog at sunrise in the park.

I blog at sunset in the dark.

I blog to gripe, bemoan my life.

I blog to rid me stress and strife.

I blog the facts and fiction too.

I blog about my woes and blues.

I blog a lot when I am bored.

I blog to tell about my Lord.

I blog when I am on the spot.

I blog with everything I've got.

I blog because I've got a plan.

I am my blogs most favorite fan.

I blog to keep my wee mind sane.

Not to blog would be a pain.

And THAT is why I blog.

Saying Goodbye to 'Friends'

Well folks, here I am, just a small engine in a great big world that believed I could pull a challenge over the hill. I started out with only a little steam, repeating to myself, "I think I can...I think I can!", and I am finishing up tonight with, "I knew I could, I knew I could!"  

This is my last entry in the challenge to blog every day during the month of January on the theme of 'Friends'. It isn't a super stupendous success story. It isn't even a major achievement, but it is satisfying. I think any time we can accomplish something that stretches us even a little bit, makes us hold to a commitment, and tests our fortitude, it can be tremendously enlivening. 

My hilly excursion has been fun, frustrating, exasperating, and exciting all rolled into one locomotive of emotion. It has tested the tracks of some my friendships, brought me new ones, and deepened old ones. I have learned, discovered, and remembered, all because I accepted a minor summons to script a few 'friends'.

I hope you've enjoyed the quips and quotes, scripts and scraps, and all the other 'friendly' rabble as much as I have, because if you have it has made my journey all the more meaningful. 

Now, I am going to say goodbye to 'Friends' and celebrate my minor accomplishment with a glass of whatever in my 'Mommy's Sippy Cup', and then I am going to snuggle up in my nice warm bed and dream of a place on this winter's night, where if I dream with all my might, I'll find a land of writers small, where in this land live blogs, that's all.     Goodnight!

Where Seldom is Heard a Discouraging Word Friends

You know the ones. They love you on your best and worst days. You can royally screw up or regally reign rightly and they are there beside you, to offer a shoulder to cry on or a hands together rousing cheer. They are the kind of friends where seldom is heard a discouraging word. In an effort to be that kind of a friend, I am going to offer you some encouraging words.

Maybe today was one of your royal screw-up days. Perhaps you overslept, got up on the wrong side of the bed, or didn't get out of bed at all. Maybe you burned breakfast, yourself or your spouse. Worse, maybe you got chewed up and spit out or maybe you did the chewing up and the spitting out. Whatever made this a messy mess up day, it's over. Stop turning the thumbscrews and put that screwdriver back in the pouch.

Today is a new day with no mistakes in it. For breakfast serve up a plate full of love, a bowl of appreciation, and a glass filled with gratitude. Remember that a bend in the road is not the end of the road, just turn with it. Life is more than a game so throw out those spades you use to dig yourself deeper, and those clubs you use to beat others over the head, and play real life with a heart.

You got this!
Way to go buddy!
You are awesome!
That was amazing!
I think it's great that you're here!

Edward Thorndike said, "Colors fade, temples crumble, empires fall, but wise words endure." I hope I've helped you endure. Now, go get 'em tiger!

I'd Walk A Mile For A Friend

While keeping with the theme of 'Friends', I thought it would be a good exercise to write a story about someone else.  After all, to write about ones self is not as challenging as telling the story of another, and putting it in your own words while still holding to their personality, character and feelings. 

I gathered information, reading over and over again the words of the one sharing their story.  I tried to put myself in their place, and to feel what they felt. When I thought I was ready I began to organize. I wrote, edited, wrote, and edited. Finally, one night, tired and a bit frazzled by the problems of the day I finished the last line and hit "publish post". 

The next morning, while reading through some comments I discovered a confirmation that although I thought the story to be good, there were parts that could have been misleading or misunderstood,  and paragraphs that could have better expounded on the heartache and drama of the story itself. This was important to me. Not for me, but for my friend. So, it was back to the keyboard once again to write until I got it right. I am so glad I did. 

In touching the heart of a friend there are abundant blessings. In moving another to cause them to walk in the sorrowful shoes of compassion is akin to touching the hem of God. To know I have touched the lives of others through the story of someone else is worth the walk. In that extra mile there are blessings, beauty, and abundance just waiting to be discovered.
 

A Not So Friendly, Friendly Network

Morning came all too quickly. It was already a little past my normal rising time, so I forced myself to abandon my cozy covers. The icy air blasted me awake and I headed for the thermostat. Winters are budget breakers. When the sun goes down on my day so does the thermostat, but I refuse to keep it at an all time low first thing in the morning. Warm air and hot coffee are a winter staple in my house.

Soon the growling drip, drip, drip, and the aromatic brew filled the house. I poured the brown, steamy liquid into my favorite cup and headed for the computer. A quick glance at the news and weather revealed nothing spectacular. I should have resisted the urge to keep my tush planted in the chair, but I gave in to the temptation to 'lolly-google' around and logged on to a social network.

I wish I had not. There before me were the not-so-friendly words. I sat dazed for a moment, then reread the lines. I took a deep breath and began to analyze the content on the screen, and searched my mind and soul seeking cause for the criticism.

I did nothing to earn the disdain and insult of friends turned fiends. So, when I tune in to a headliner or a one-liner directed to reduce me to fine print, my ink runs. Now, I have a few things to say.

I think it's sad that something that was started to bring people together, to connect us to each other has sunk to the low level of criticism, and is now mostly google gossip, and faceless feuds. How easy it has become to post a comment on a screen. The unfriendly, friendly network is becoming more and more a hub to the desensitized society of the social network. It is a heartless as well. People ignore the fact that on the other end of their faceless attacks is a flesh and blood person with feelings.

To all those who think they can say whatever they want, whenever they want, and never take into account the other person's feelings, I have this to say. It doesn't make you bigger to make someone else smaller, it doesn't make you right to 'correct' others, and beating someone down with a gavel of gaggle doesn't make you a judge.

To those who have said, "I don't know how you will feel at the end of this conversation, but I'm going to feel a whole lot better!"; to that score of people who nailed someone to the wall for no good reason except their own agenda; to those who think they can use people as placeholders until someone better comes along; to all of those people I say, I am not wasting my feelings on those criticisms anymore. Please pull that knife out of my back and stick it in your sheath. There is no such thing as obligatory relationship. I will love you from a distance.

Finally, to those who have stuck with me through thick and thin, who have encouraged me and loved me into the person I am and the person I am becoming. You are the ones who live it out, who breathe life into others, and walk the twain mile in other peoples' shoes. I want to say, Thank You! I love you and appreciate you more than you will ever know.

A Tried and True Facebook Friend

As is common with Facebook, many of us accept friend requests from people because they know someone who knows someone who knows us. That is how I met Debbie.

Her profile isn't so different than some of the rest of us. Debbie has children and grandchildren whom she loves to pieces. She lives with her husband, and an adopted bird, and three dogs. They live in a modest home in the western United States and she refers to it as their money pit. She works to help make ends meet. Baking, cooking and crocheting are among her talents. She also creates spectacular quilts. Her generosity and good works follow her, and her kind heart is as warm as the hearth beside a cozy fire.

Debbie married the sweetheart of her youth. He lived just five doors down from her house and referred to her as the girl with the pink curtains. There weren't many girls on that street, and the guys were always short a ball player, so Debbie would stand in and pitch for them. It was enough for the time being that she was just friends with David because her father often called him DDT, for David D Trouble. As with many childhood sweethearts though, David and Debbie built a foundation upon their friendship and soon they grew to love each other. She cried on his shoulder, and he told all the boys in the neighborhood that he was going to marry her.

Being just sixteen Debbie encountered a bit of friction announcing her plans to wed David. He was no older than she, and he had a wild side. They were just two young kids, wet behind the ears, wanting to plunge into the ocean of matrimony. Their marriage was held in such low regard, and the perceived chance of making it was such a longshot that even the preacher bet against them.

Like many marriages there were rough spots that needed sanding and they worked those out together. One major change took place the day Debbie announced that they were moving to another city in Arizona. She told David he could either come or stay, but the drinking was staying behind.

It was the beginning of a new life, but not without heartache. Their youngest son, Scottie, especially liked his new home. Here he could hunt, and fish, and he loved the snow. He was a good boy, and a hard worker. He liked helping out at the grooming shop where Debbie worked, and loved being around the dogs. Many times he could be found dragging home a stray by a rope around their neck, or giving away puppies on the corner. He wasn't perfect, but was never bad. To Debbie, he was mama's boy, and he aimed to please her.

Scottie was deaf until the age of three, when they discovered enlarged adenoids were causing his hearing loss. With surgery he gained his hearing, but his speech was littered with the leftovers of that impairment. Sometimes, he had to endure the taunts and teasing of the neighborhood bullies until one day after a little encouragement from David to stand up to them, he picked up a motorcycle shock and cleaned house. That day he earned their respect.

The worst tragedy of Debbie's life happened one day while David's parents were visiting. Scottie and two of his friends were on their way to Tucson to pick up his friend's brother, Scottie's best friend. David didn't want him to go, but the child's pout moved his mother's heart and Debbie gave in to the look. Soon, the three boys were on their way with a full tank of gas and full smiles. Failing an attempt to pass a car, and instead of getting back in the line of traffic, they misjudged and headed to the opposite side. The car was struck and burst into flames. Scottie and the other two boys were killed instantly. There was nothing left of the car but the frame.

Debbie was gone shopping and David was doing yard work when the highway patrol approached him with the most horrible news of his life, but his ordeal was not over. He was also face to face with the worst thing he ever had to do, break the news to Debbie, the mother of his sweet boy. His nightmare continued as he told Scottie's brothers, and the rest of their loved ones. With all three families frozen in gut retching shock and sorrow, and the boys remains unreleased far from home, David drew on a strength and presence from deep within. He took the lead and arranged and paid the expenses for all three boys to be brought home together.

Three boys and three funerals in three days; Debbie's baby, her Scottie, one of them. Standing before a closed casket, Debbie recalled the weeks before Scottie died. David's grandmother was in the hospital, and the family went to say their goodbyes to her. They all took turns and hugged her neck and Scottie was the last in line. She hugged him longer and told him she would see him on the other side.

Debbie's work helped her to get out of bed in the mornings and she forced herself to be strong for David and her other two boys. After a few months, dazed and drained, she fell apart. Thanksgiving that year Debbie told her mom she had nothing to be thankful for, but her faith would not let her go.

In the night God reminded her that He spared her son Luke. Just a short time before the accident that claimed Scottie's life, Luke was hit by a car and his leg shattered in seven places, his pelvis broken and his jaw shattered. He nearly died on the medical emergency flight to Phoenix because the weather delayed the landing. Not only was Luke's life spared, but a short while later, the life of her new grandson, Cody, who was born premature and weighed only one and a half pounds.

In Debbie's words, "So, the Lord has blessed us through all the trials we have gone through. We thank Him every day for the things he gave us and didn't take away. David and I have become the best of friends through all our trials and heartbreaks. We grow every day and depend on each other, and I think that's what makes a marriage. Two people growing to be the best of friends. We raised our kids the best we knew how with the knowledge we had at the time. There was no book to follow. It was kids raising kids. Thank God we learned something before our grandkids came along."

I have never met Debbie face to face, but I do know that we have traveled similar paths. She has endured and overcome horrendous adversity in her life. I have great respect for her, and have come to love her as a dear friend. Debbie and her husband of forty-one years, live in Show Low, Arizona. Just two young-at-heart kids, the best of friends, bonded together by the glue of adversity and a deep faith in the One who overcomes.

Printed with permission as told to me by Debbie.